Goodbye Hello

"Cause it's a bittersweet symphony this life..." 

- The Verve

I'm feeling extremely bittersweet about moving on to a new job. At times I feel so fed up with thinking for other people and sorting out issues that aren't mine to sort out, that I would be happy to walk out the door at that instant. And then, 5 minutes later, I start to feel extremely sad at leaving a bunch of people who I've worked closely with for the last (almost) two years.

There's a list of things that I'm not going to miss that runs through my mind on a daily basis, but for every "thing" that I won't miss I have at least one "counter-thing" that I will miss.

I will miss teaching the people who have a genuine thirst for knowledge and who use that knowledge to go out and improve the plant. To see someone use what you have taught them, it something incredibly rewarding.

I won't miss teaching the same people the same thing, day and and day out, who come to you with an issue expecting you to solve it before they've even looked at the issue themselves. It's soul-destroying and frustrating.

I will miss meetings that turn into an impromptu chat with the other 1 person who is also on time, where you learn more about work and the history of the factory than you would have from the meeting that was meant to happen.

I won't miss going to meetings where arriving on time is considered to be early and the word "late" does not seem to exist in peoples vocabulary. Neither do the words "Sorry I'm late" exist.

I will miss the fact that when I've been called out by one of my team, no matter what mood I'm in, somehow I always leave with a smile on my face.

I won't miss the job and the fact that I work at a place that never sleeps. Ever. And the guilt of missing calls or not being able to help when you're far away, even though it's not even your problem to begin with.

I will miss being able to disappear into the factory for hours at a time when I have nothing to do in my office and a craving to walk around. No one ever questions someone walking around the factory, making sure the lines are running smoothly.

I won't miss my heart speeding up and adrenaline coursing through my veins every time my phone rings - because usually it's someone from work. I won't miss being complained to but not ever given a solution for those same complaints. Being told about problems that don't concern me and being expected to fix them or know why they're there. Repeating myself day in and day out, reminding people (who are grown ups) to just do their jobs. Going to battle every day, suited up in white coat, earplugs and hairnet. Banging. My. Head. Against. A. Brick. Wall. 

I will miss the people. The individuals who commiserate with me when I'm frustrated and celebrate with me when we get something right. The ones who have been at the factory for years. And the ones who have been here for a few months. I will miss our Engineering morning meeting prayers. How everyone greets each other, no matter if you've seen that person 3 times before that day or if you're complete strangers. Planning fun events for new grads with a group of people who are based at all our different sites. Trips to Durban HO. The laughs I share with my team and learning about people who are so different to me in so many ways, but similar to me in the ways that count. I will miss learning and interacting with company leaders who challenge our points of view. Promising to go for coffee breaks with colleagues every day, almost going to a coffee break (and then one of us gets called to look at something) and then finally, actually going for that break about 2 weeks later. 

Maybe one day I'll come back and see how the factory is looking. Maybe I wont. Either way I'll be sad to say goodbye. On the flip side, I'm excited for what the future hold and new challenges that are coming my way. I'm down to single digit sleeps until my last day. I can hear Cape Town calling!

Five

This Valentine's Day will be the first time we've been apart in 5 years. Seems like a lifetime and a minute ago that we first started dating but either way it's been such fun and we've both learnt a lot. Frosty gave me a card for my birthday last year, at the front was written

I love this quote and think that it pretty much sums us up.

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On Valentine's Day 5 years ago I went to pre-drinks with a group of mates and then went on to watch the Sharks play the Stormers at Newlands Rugby Stadium. I remember taking a taxi there (one of those proper taxis, with the guy at the front shouting our final destination each time we stopped), and being made to down the remainder of the vodka-coke mix that we had all been sharing during the pre-drinks session. Lets just say I didn't register much of that rugby match...Lucky I don't usually watch rugby, so I don't feel like I missed out too much. I was walked home and put into bed by Frosty before the sun had even gone down (but it stays light until late in Cape Town in summer time, so it probably wasn't that early). He went out to party with some friends for the rest of that night. On the plus side, going to bed so early meant I woke up fresh as a daisy the next morning! I even saw the beautiful sunrise!

Needless to say, it wasn't a particularly romantic Valentine's Day, but it was only after the day that we decided to use Valentine's Day to mark our anniversary. Makes it easy for Frosty to remember and I get to tease him that he got me horribly drunk during our first Valentine's Day together.

The next year it was slightly more romantic. We went camping in Franschhoek and just took some time to chill and explore the area. It was an awesome thing to do and hopefully in the near future we'll be doing a bit more exploring of those areas. I think on that year we also went out for dinner to celebrate a friend's birthday and got to watch the sun setting over Clifton/Bantry Bay and learnt all about Greek food.  

For our 2nd anniversary, I can't really remember what we did. But it was a Monday night. I think we probably just went out for dinner? Or maybe we went out for an O-week party? No. Idea.
Edit: I've been reminded that we went on a double-date to Signal Hill on this Valentine's day with friends: Russell and Cat. I have no idea why I didn't remember this, as it was a pretty fun afternoon/evening watching the sun set over the sea, drinking wine and eating yummy snacks!

We were in the States for our 3rd anniversary. We woke up early before work so we could open gifts. Frosty hid my gifts in the safe that was in my room and made me hunt for them - I  was very impressed, my romantic training was starting to pay off. Then I went on to work and he went to sleep because he had to work later on that night.

I had dinner with another guy on Valentine's day on our 4th anniversary. But it was because I was waiting to pick Frosty up from the airport and unintentionally I had made plans with my friend for that night. And it helped to make the time go quicker while waiting for Frosty to arrive. (Don't worry Frost, we talked mainly about long distance relationships and how much they suck.) I made him a cute painting series to commemorate the highlights of the last four years.

And this Valentine's day we'll be apart. I'm driving to KZN for the weekend to drop stuff at home in preparation for moving out my flat. Frosty hands his thesis in on Friday and will probably be catching up on sleep and enjoying his first free weekend in a while. And we'll celebrate when I get to Cape Town, only 17 more sleeps until I arrive back in the Cape and I'm too excited to be heading back soon!

Long Distance - The Good and Bad

Taking a rest while going for an afternoon
stroll in Baberton...to the top of the highest
peak in Swaziland :)

So, for almost 2 years, Frosty and I have been living a 2 hour plane ride apart - he in Cape Town and I in the East Rand. We've tried to see each other as much as possible, but in general there is about a month in between the times that we see each other. This is soon coming to an end as I'm going back to the Cape soon. But I thought it would be useful to reflect on what I've learnt about long distance relationships and how we survived a long distance relationship.

Many relationships don't survive long distances and I can understand why - living apart from your significant other is difficult! Especially when you're used to spending most of your time together.

However, distance can be a good thing and gives you a chance to grow into your own person, without an "and" separating you and your partners names, automatically classifying you as one entity. Especially since we spent most of our varsity time together, our friends are all the same and they've grown used to viewing us as a couple. 

As time has gone on, I've tried to change my point of view and turn my own frustrations into happiness (or at least acceptance). So, here is my list of the frustrations, happiness and lessons learnt from long distance (and approved by Frosty who shares my sentiments).

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Frustration 
Your significant other goes out for the night or away for the weekend - dinner, house party, drinks, camping, you name it. You're so tired you could fall asleep where you're standing but for some reason you just can't get to sleep or turn off your brain and you spend the entire night/weekend/day being jealous of the fun they're having and wondering what they're getting up to with a bunch of people that you've never met before.

Happiness
You're exhausted, so you use their going out or being busy as an excuse to jump into bed early, read a page or two of your book and go to sleep all before they've even left to go out for the night. If it's for a longer period of time you organise to visit friends in the big city over the weekend. Otherwise, when you're not sleepy/can't sleep you use the time to catch up on activities that you don't get a chance to do when you're together and have missed doing.

Lesson Learnt
When you don't live in a particularly social area or most of your friends live far away, you need to find other ways to keep busy so that you don't drive yourself crazy wondering what they're up to. Especially when they live in an area that is significantly more social than yours. If it's for a longer period of time, try to organise to see friends who live slightly-too-far-to-pop-in-for-a-cup-of-tea, but close-enough-that-a-weekend-visit-is-awesome.

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Frustration
One of you is busy for what seems like days on end for whatever reason. You're lucky to get/be able to give a 5 minute phone call or a quick 2 line message.

Happiness
Catching up afterwards. At least the next time you talk properly one of you hopefully has lots of interesting news. Plus, often the busy stages seem to be just before you get to see each other - so it means that the number of sleeps on your countdown is getting smaller!

Lesson Learnt
Life comes in waves. Sometimes it's busy. Sometimes it's mind-numbingly slow. The busy times give you a chance to catch up nicely and have a different conversation to the normal day-to-day conversations. And if they're being busy and you're feeling forgotten, tell them. Sometimes that busyness can be postponed until a later stage.

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Frustration

Trust and jealousy. It's hard to trust each other and not let irrational jealous thoughts run through your mind when you're far away. Even when you know that you can, without a doubt-no questions asked trust each other, it's difficult. New friends - especially those of the opposite sex, are especially hard to come to terms with. Because then the jealous "what if's" start and it's hard to shut them up, even when you know it's irrational.

Happiness

Actions speak louder than words and sometimes you just have to have faith in each other and be happy in that faith.

Lesson Learnt

Trust is hard and the only way that it can happen is by showing the other that you can be trusted and having faith in your partner. Dealing with jealousy is also hard, because your imagination runs wild and even when you know you're being irrational you can't help your thoughts. It helps to tell the other person when you're not comfortable with something (but wait a day until your rational mind is back). You also need to be completely honest with each other and tell each other your concerns and why you feel a certain way about something.

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Frustration

Not seeing each other for a long time. It's in those small moments - going for a walk, watching a movie, sharing a meal - that relationships are built. Sometimes you feel out of touch because you miss out on these moments.

Happiness

Counting down the days and hours until you see each other again. You make the most out of the time you do spend together. You cherish the time spent together and do more special stuff, just because you don't get to do it on a whim.

Lesson Learnt

The anticipation of seeing someone after not seeing them for a long time is a special type of excitement. And nothing beats a real life hug hello. Also, having a time limit on how long you're going to be apart is a huge help in getting you through the seemingly endless days of not being with someone.

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Moral of the story: long distance is hard. But it can also be worth it if you're willing to make the most of being apart.

The Making And Inspiration Of My Under The Sea Paintings

Near the end of 2012, I was staying in Durban and saw the paintings below at the hotel that I was staying at (for the life of me I can't remember the name of the hotel). I loved the boldness and brightness of the colours in these paintings as decided at some stage in the future to try something similar for myself. I stupidly didn't take a note of the artist either - so if you painted these, or know who did, please let me know so I can credit them!

Inspiration for my own "Under The Sea" series

Last year over Easter time, I went to the 2 Oceans Aquarium with Frosty and his family and I took some awesome pictures of some of the ocean life there. When I got back home, I decided to make the 4 pictures below into an "Under The Sea" series of paintings, using the bold colour pallets of the paintings above as an inspiration.

Amphiprioninae - Clown Fish

I have no idea what type of fish this is - any suggestions would be welcome!
Edit: this could be a puffer fish, but I think I'll take a trip to the aquarium to verify as well!

Ostracion cubicus - Yellow Box Fish (juvenile)

Medusozoa - Jellyfish (unsure of the exact type)

I started off with the clown fish and really enjoyed putting this painting together. I love the contrast of the orange, black and white that are on this fish and it fits in perfectly with my "bright and bold" theme!

Outline in pencil

Filling in the base orange colour

Putting in some details

Adding in the black and shading in the white areas

Putting the background together

The final product of my first part of the series!

And the original image - for comparison

I then moved on to the, at this stage, unknown, fish. I chose this one because I loved how the red background and angle of the photograph made a rather plain and simple fish look so much more interesting.

Pencil outline getting the basic size and shapes in place

Starting off with the base coats to give underlying form to the fish

Adding on the next layer to get the top looking more realistic

Putting in some more details like fins and spots

The final product - bold very red!

Again, the original picture

I decided to do the juvenile yellow box fish third and found this one more difficult than I originally thought it would be. I actually got to the "almost completed" stage and then left it for a few months because I started to get over trying to make it look nice, for a while. I remember learning at school and varsity that blue and yellow provide one of the most visually noticeable

contrasts and I think that this yellow box fish verifies this idea. 

Getting an idea of the basic layout that my painting would take

Filling in some yellow. You can see here that the underbelly of the fish isn't looking
great at this point...

An almost completed image

With bubbles and a slightly better looking underbelly

The fish from the photograph

I lastly put together the painting of the jellyfish. I've always found jellyfish to be rather mystical creatures and love that when they are lit up in the aquarium, it almost seems that the light is radiating from within them.

I usually start most of my painting off in pencil, although I don't often put
the details in with pencil

This time I decided to paint the background first and then move on to the actual jellyfish.
This is a great example of what "negative space" is. Basically you concentrate on
drawing everything that surrounds the object and you don't focus on the object itself.

With a light coating of blue in the jellyfish and a forgotten slice of background
colour within the jellyfish tentacles

The painting is starting to come together at this point, with the top of the jellyfish starting to
look as though light is emanating from within it

The completed jellyfish, along with cute little "stars" to add to the mystery of the creature

The jellyfish that I found at the 2 Oceans Aquarium

And finally - the completed series of paintings all together!

All 4 paintings together. They make quite a handsome group, even if I say so myself.

I'm really looking forward to hanging these up - I think that my aim of putting together something that was bright and bold really was realised by this series of paintings. 

Each of these paintings took me about a weekend, on average, from start to finish. Some only took me a few hours while others took a solid day to 2 days to complete properly.

Now I just need to find some inspiration for my next set of paintings! Any suggestions are welcome!

Dear Readers

I've been blogging for a while now, and I've managed to amass some loyal readers along the way.

Now, I want to ensure that my posts are what you want to hear and so, I've put together a quick poll to find out what your post preferences are.

Do you see where that bright arrow at the top of my post is pointing? Got it? Great! 

Now all you need to do is select your favourite types of posts so that I can create more posts like these in the future.

You have until midnight on the 28th Feb to complete this poll :)

It May Feel Like Schmoozing But...

Many people scoff at the idea of team-buildings,
but they're a great platform to build your network

I've recently had occasion to reach out to the network of peers and classmates that I built up at varsity, as well as my extended family network. Now, a lot of people I know cringe when they hear the word "networking", and I'm guilty of this as well. I have always felt that networking for the sake of networking feels a little fake. It feels as though you're sucking up to the people you're talking to. Schmoozing. Yuck.

I think a lot of people really battle with the concept of networking, especially people who are fresh out of school and varsity. Making small talk and finding out about what someone does with the hope that one day, in the future, they may be able to help you out, has never really appealed to me. When I'm networking for the sake of networking I feel as though I'm not being true to myself and I'm not being true to the people that I'm meeting. I like to think that I'm a genuine person, who is interested in people for the sake of being interested in them, as opposed to being interested in them for what they can do for me. 

However, I've found recently by changing my concept of networking, I've been able to put a whole new spin on my feelings about it. I now view networking as "relationship building" and the whole concept has suddenly become a lot more palatable. It's these relationships that I've built up over the days, weeks, months and years that I view as my network. These are my friends, family members, old classmates and colleagues.

I think that part of the concept of networking is sometimes feeling a bit lame when you call up a stranger out of the blue, asking for a favour. When I know someone at some sort of personal level, I find it that much easier to call them up to ask them for some help. I also find that if I know someone personally, I'm more comfortable asking them to refer me to someone from their own network of friends, family and colleagues. If I already have a connection with someone, no matter what it is, I find it easier to strike up (or continue on with) a relationship with them. And that, at the end of the day, is what networking is all about. Building relationships with people. 

When My Phone Rings

I was chatting with some colleagues the other day and apart from the fact that we work in the same place, we all had one other thing in common. 

When our phone's ring, our hearts sink.

It doesn't matter whether it's the middle of the day in the middle of the week, in the evening, early in the morning or over the weekend. If it's the middle of the night, as I struggle to get my brain cogs turning, I know for sure that this sinking feeling is an indication that in the next 5 minutes I'm going to have to drag myself out of bed and go to work.

The first thing that any of us think any time that we hear our phone ringing is

"bugger, what's gone wrong at the factory now? I hope I don't have to go in."

We never think, oh, it must be my friend calling to meet for drinks or dinner. The thought of parents calling to say hello is the furtherest thing from our minds when our phones ring. 

Instead our hearts start pumping and adrenaline starts building up, preparing you for the inevitable call to work because something has gone wrong and you're the lucky person who has to go in and fix it - possibly for unknown hours on end.

Even when we're expecting a call from someone, that feel of dread rises up until we see the number. If we're lucky enough that it's a friend or family member, we start to breathe and calm the panic that started to flutter in our stomachs. If it's someone from work, you can be guaranteed that in the next minute or so you're going to need to drop what you're doing and prepare yourself to go to battle. Yes, battle. Adrenaline then really gets pumping and only stops when you've solved the problem and are back home.

Private numbers are the worst. 

Because at work all the landlines are set to private number. You should generally answer private number calls during business hours. Even though private number calls also turn out to be those annoying people who are trying to sell you another cell phone contract or insurance that you don't need and can't afford. Or it's some bloody annoying person/program that calls your number 5 times a day EVERY DAY and hangs up as soon as you answer the phone. 

I've taken to waiting a few seconds before saying hello when I get called on private number, because if it happens to be that stupid "hanging up" person I want to waste as much of their airtime as possible. Then I suspiciously speak and only once the person has introduced themselves to me (and I've verified that they're not from work or trying to sell me something) then I become friendly.

I don't know if other people have this problem with their work. But we do. And the fact that my colleagues feel the same way that I do makes me feel a little better about hating it when my phone rings.